This is not a post I’m proud to write, but one I think (hope) other parents can relate to. 

S is growing quickly. Every day sees a new skill, or new word. He is a pint sized sponge. Absorbing everything around him (even when he’s seemingly not paying attention) devouring every new bit of information that he can lay his eyes and ears on. He can count to 10 in French and English, he knows the days of the week, he’s starting to use the potty more than he uses nappies, he can pedal around on his bike, and he can use full sentences. 

“Oh F**k I dropped it mama”

Inevitably, as the child of a potty mouthed parent, he’s picked up a few curse words. 

Now. Bonus points for using them in context, but man do I feel like a failure when these words fall out of his angelic little face. 

“Oh Hell fire and damnation” 

“You silly old bat” 

(Thank you for those Grand-mère!) 

We’re at that point where we are desperately trying to rewind. To make him “forget” these new words he’s picked up. We’re a bilingual family! Surely it can’t be that difficult to replace the swears with other fascinating words? 

We ignore the swear words, try and replace the swear words, offer a slightly different word, “No it’s pronounced like this” 

But he’s not daft. He knows. He must know. Maybe we have reacted to it too much. I wanted the ground to swallow me up the other day when S ran round the house in front of our dinner guest repeatedly shouting F********ck at the top of his lungs. 

I’m not entirely sure how to make it stop. Reducing my own swearing is a start (not easy when you are battling a massive temper yourself!) and making sure hubby swears less especially when watching bike racing. 

“Oh Sh*t Daddy, big crash”

Reminding friends to please not swear around him, and trying not to watch tv shows that contain swearing when he’s still awake. 

I’m not sure what else to do. Well meaning friends tell me that he will pick up worse once he starts school, but right now it looks like he will be the one teaching his new amis how to be a potty mouth. 

I tell myself it’s not all doom and gloom. He can also be such a polite and charming little boy, 

Pleased to meet you

Please may I leave the table

Thank you for dinner Mama

Good morning squish face, I love you (Squish face is the nickname for his little sister) 

Then he swears, and I’m consumed by mama guilt and an overwhelming feeling of failure. 

Did your children go through a phase of swearing? How did you resolve it? Will I ever be able to take him out in public again? 


Naptime Natter